Your A-Ha Moment is Not Coming

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I wrote a post a while back about how not everything is precious – how you can’t take your work SO seriously that it has to be perfect. It might never be perfect. It might only ever be a few steps better than a job working for someone else. But if it gives you the lifestyle you want, that might be ok.


And I have some kind of disheartening news: For most people, there will never be a big a-ha moment when you finally realize what your life purpose is all about.


There won’t be unicorns and rainbows and shooting stars. And there definitely won’t be any opening up of the heavens, white light, or fall-to-your knees kinds of feelings.

More likely, you’ll start with an idea that doesn’t feel  totally perfect. You’ll tweak it as you go. And at some point, it will start feeling pretty good.

It’s kind of like aging. You’re always getting older, but you don’t really notice it. It’s not like one day you’re 20, and the next day, you’re grey and wrinkled. It happens slowly over time, and one day you look in the mirror and you’re like “Huh… I got old”

It’s kind of like that.


You keep working towards what feels like the best fit, and one day, you’ll look at where you are compared to where you started, and you’ll be like “Huh… I’m doing something pretty cool”.


I’m sure some people have those holy grail, ah-ha moments, but for the most part what I see in my business is some excited-yet-hesitant feelings of about an idea or a business concept. Paired with a desire to make things happen, this is all you need to get started.

Stop waiting for the moment when all of a sudden, you’ll know exactly what you’re meant to be doing in the world. It’s an illusion. And actually, it kind of pisses me off that we’ve been made to feel that we MUST find the ONE thing that is our life’s purpose/passion. It’s been detrimental to me in my own life, and I’m sure you can relate. You’re searching for the ONE thing, and you’ll just KNOW when you find it.

Right. Good luck with that.

Start where you are. Do what feels right, for now. Don’t get caught up in thinking there has to be ONE thing that you will do for the rest of your life, and that you can’t do anything til you’ve found it.

Stop waiting for your a-ha moment. It’s not coming. And start doing the thing that actually WILL get you closer to where you wan to be – taking charge and taking action. Your business is waiting.

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PS. Uncage Your Business is the opposite of waiting for an a-ha moment – it’s about intentionally CREATING that a-ha for yourself, and then using to actually grow your damn business. Finally. Click here for more.



Read 11 Comments & Leave Yours

  1. KarenTaggart

    While some may find this depressing, I actually think it’s a huge relief!  And it’s also the kick in the pants to get moving and stop waiting for that aha moment.
    “Excited-yet-hesitant feelings paired with the desire to make it happen”?  I can do that! :)
    By the way…getting old (physically) sucks! But I actually like getting older in every other way. :)

  2. SchuylerKaye

    This reminds me of the alchemist… where a boy goes searching for treasure only to return a man and realize it was right where he began. In my experience, my business feels more and more like home as I grow into the man I’m to become.
    Almost like the two of us are on some awesome journey… one that starts off a little uneventful and awkward. Then as I get to know my companion (business) better through all the adventures we go through, he eventually feels like a brother or best friend. One where just being in his presence feels … right.
    I suppose there are some events or adventures that can make that happen all at once… an ah ha. Yet I think you’re right that for most of the work, it is a process of tiny realizations guiding us into a business that feels like home.
    Always a pleasure to read your writing Becca.

  3. KarenTaggart It IS a relief, right!? So much better to know that not everyone had it figured out when they started!

  4. SchuylerKaye Great metaphor Schu! It totally is like a living, breathing relationship.

  5. theWardrobeCode

    Thank you for writing this! I think waiting for your ah-ha moment runs along the same lines as the idea that you must be incredibly and totally passionate about what you’re doing. It just doesn’t always work that way, and implies that if you don’t have the ah-ha moment, or you’re not 100% passionate all the time, that you’re doing something wrong.
    We won’t always be passionate, we won’t always be inspired. The trick is to keep going and find what you DO like every day, no matter how small.

  6. davidmasters

    I wrote about this over at the Change Blog:

    But still I fall into the trap of waiting for the booming voiceover from the sky to tell me what my life’s purpose is. 

    I’m grateful for the reminder.

  7. Pingback: Don't Confuse Your Why With Your What | A Walk in the CloudsA Walk in the Clouds

  8. theWardrobeCode  Whoa, holy late reply, sorry!! I somehow missed this! YES! It’s all about DOING something everyday, versus waiting to feel motivated. I find you can build motivation when you start seeing results, but you won’t see results unless you actually start.

  9. Love it! We have been sold these AHA!-moments in stories and testimonials to expect that it’s the norm. I never have one of those, and it made me feel like “I must be doing something wrong.” Great reminder that for most people, it’s an evolution and as long as we are moving forward, mindful about the direction/actions we take (e.g. not doing something because “everyone else is doing it” or because of fears), we will get close to our true destiny. And great reminder to take a look back and see how far we have gone!

  10. Ffion

    Kind of needed to hear this today. Thank you! Plugging on! Things are looking up but I’m in a bit of a slump today. This was good to hear.

  11. Tess

    Thank you and amen sista! If we kept waiting for the lightening bolt of anything I’d still be waiting to decide if I wanted to go to college much less keep my first job out of college. I learn as much from figuring out what bits I don’t like than waiting for all the bits to be perfect! In less than a year I’ve tested 3 different ‘passions’ on the side, 2 have been put to bed after testing since pieces didn’t fit, but thank god I could test quickly and move on! Now I’ve landed in a place I hadn’t exactly planned with a consulting gig, but which allowed me to give notice on exiting the corp. gig last Friday – wahoo!